Belxan meets Barney
Last night, whilest wandering near the shrine of Chaos, I didst behold a
most wondrous sight. The shrine was besieged by numerous purple robed
characters all named Barney. This benevolent "Purple Horde" took it upon
themselves to repeatedly kill any person of ill repute who attempted to
use the shrine.
When questioned, all they would reply with was a few strange phrases such
as, "Hi there! My name's Barney! What's yours?" and "I want to be your
Their typical modus operandi was to hide on the shrine, preventing the
shrine's use. When someone finally managed to use the shrine, they would
pop out of hiding and say "Peek-a-boo! I see you, can you see me?" and
then pommel their victim with blows and the "I love you" song.
After the victim was dispatched, they would often chant, "Well that's
It appeared as if this "Purple Horde" did not fear death at all. They
each died several times while I was watching but they would simply get
resurrected again. Their corpses never had any loot and they would always
resurrect with the same purple robe. They wrestled their opponents so
they never had any weapons to lose.
I could not confirm this, but several of the evil players in the area
claimed that Barney had robbed them of some of their possessions. Runes
and reagents were the items that most often seemed to go missing.
At one point in the evening, one of their hapless victims got so annoyed
that he uttered a few racial slurs. In short order GM Pist appeared,
whisked the offender to the top of the nearby cliffs, and promptly
banned the bigot! A great cheer went up through the ranks of the
Barneys who proceeded to bow and chant "Barney loves you!"
Here follow pictures taken througout the evening:
Blood and gore surround the shrine
Barneys seem to come out of thin air
Barney attacks Nystul
Barney surrounds a victim
GM Pyst arrives after a victim resorts to racial slurs
The GM and the offender confer on the overlooking cliff. The offender is banned from Ultima Online.
Barney bows and thanks the GM for his wisdom
"We don't need pepople like that in the game" says the GM
Barney poses for a picture and gives the traditional greeting